Fragments in the Sun
by Kathey27
Summary: Because it all had to start somewhere. Part of the Violet 'verse. edited november 1, 2014


**A/N: I've been working on this for a while now and I didn't even think I'd be able to get it out today but then I was struck with inspiration Wednesday and well…tada!**

**It's part of the Violet 'verse so the facts with that story, line up with this one. It's basically Ruby's life before and during Hell. I tried to span out her years in Hell well because she was down there for 78,960 years Hell time since she's from Italy in my 'verse and the Black Death came to Sicily in 1347.**

**Oh! And a quick thank you for my A.P. World teacher who went really in depth with the Black Death in class the other day and made the middle portion of this story possible. You're awesome!**

**This one-shot is dedicated to Ms. Cassidy whose birthday is today. Hope you're having a good day wherever you are Katie and that you return to Supernatural soon to set things right!**

**_EDIT: November 1, 2014: Since I'm editing the main Violet 'verse currently, I've decided to go back and edit this one as well. Scenes have been edited, added in and cut out._**

**Disclaimer: If I owned anything, Ruby and Dean would have been given the chance to be great.**

* * *

><p><strong>fragments in the sun:<strong>

The story begins in 1322 on a rainy day.

It's in Sicily (except it's not Sicily back then), Caltanissetta to be exact and it'd been painful. Bianca Leggeiri goes through an eleven-hour labor and in the end she's left with a premature, 4 pounds and 13 ounces, crying baby. The town doctor tells her the baby won't survive; too small, too weak. Isn't going to make it past the next hour.

Morning comes and the baby's still alive.

* * *

><p>Bianca holds her baby close to her chest, brushes back frail strands of blonde hair and smiles.<p>

"Caroline. Her name's Caroline."

* * *

><p>Ermes Leggeiri comes home from a long trip to find his wife beaming down at their new child.<p>

He gazes down at the smiling, tiny face that has such _blue_ eyes and…can't find it in himself to feel anything.

* * *

><p>Four months pass and Caroline survives every cold and every illness that comes her way. She's growing fast and she's getting healthier and her mother loves her, so, so much but her father…Ermes won't even touch her.<p>

* * *

><p>"You haven't so much as looked at your child since you've returned." Bianca whispers one night as she bundles up the baby as best as she can. She's brushing down strands of wispy blonde hair and tightening cloths and can't find it in herself to glance up.<p>

"That…that thing is not my child."

She looks up at this to see her husband holding a mug of wine and sighs. "Ermes…"

"She…she has blue eyes. I don't have blue eyes. You don't have blue eyes. How does our baby have blue eyes?"

"Ermes – all – all the babies h-have blue eyes at first." She stutters, heart racing and fear building.

"Get out of my face." He growls. She hesitates for a moment before leaving the room.

* * *

><p>Caroline turns two and her sentences are short and choppy and slurred but Bianca can understand them just fine.<p>

_"Why won't dada touch me?"_

Bianca scoops up her child, holds her tight and sighs. "I don't know baby girl. I don't know."

* * *

><p>(Caroline is a beautiful little girl with nice, long blonde hair and sparkling eyes and a little smirk that could catch anyone. She's sweet and kind and goes to church with her mama like they tell her to and plays with the neighbor's children like they want her to and she does everything right because that's how girls are supposed to be.<p>

She does everything right.

So why doesn't her dada love her?).

* * *

><p>When she turns three her father takes her aside, cups her cheeks and sighs.<p>

"It's not your fault little girl."

"Then love me." She whispers, chubby hands clinging tight to his tunic.

"I…I can't."

* * *

><p>(At five she stops asking for dada to love her and focuses on the love she's already getting from her mama).<p>

* * *

><p>Caroline meets Gabriela on her seventh birthday after she's tripped over her dress and can't get up. The ground is rough and hard and muddy and she's just too tired to stand.<p>

Then a small redhead walks on over and shoves a hand in her face. "Need help." It isn't a question.

And from then on they're inseparable.

* * *

><p>At nine she meets Raul and hates him instantly. He's mean and bigger than her and keeps pulling on her braids and tugs on her dress and asks her stupid questions and has eyes that shine with malice.<p>

But she doesn't say anything because she's supposed to be a lady and ladies don't make scenes.

* * *

><p>Gabriela and her watch the stars sometimes. Whenever they're allowed to stay up pass dark, they'll lie on the ground and star watch.<p>

"What do you think they are?" She asks one night because although she's a lady, she needs more.

"Stars." Gabriela deadpans, fiddling with her dress.

Caroline smiles brightly. "I think they're souls. Little pieces of souls. Of the dead. They're there to watch out for us, keep us safe."

"…I just see stars."

She sighs and starts to keep things to herself.

* * *

><p>Caroline's thirteen years old when her mother pulls her aside and asks her if she knows who Raul is.<p>

She scowls and nods.

"He's going to be someone _very_ important to you soon."

* * *

><p>It takes her a few days to get that she's being pawned off for marriage.<p>

* * *

><p>She stands there and smiles pretty-pretty because she's a lady and ladies get married young and raise families and have love and…if she has to see Raul eyeing her barely there chest one more time, so help her…<p>

* * *

><p>Caroline wears the ivory lace gown and keeps her mouth shut and smiles and…dies a little bit inside.<p>

* * *

><p>Bianca enters the room to find her baby girl crying her eyes out.<p>

"Oh sweetheart…"

"Please mama, _please_! Don't make me go! I need you!" Caroline sobs, clutching her mother tight.

Bianca thins her lips, holds her daughter close and sighs. "You need your husband."

* * *

><p>Her first night at her new home she lets her…<em>husband<em> run his hands around her and kiss her body hungrily and…doesn't say a thing.

* * *

><p>She has her first baby at fourteen and it's born like her. It's sick and small and pale and…<p>

…And unlike her, it doesn't make it past the first hour.

* * *

><p>Two years pass and she's finally accepted her role. She's the broken wife. The one who can smile and clean and cook and…and the one who can't keep a child.<p>

She gets pregnant fine. Delivers okay but then…the babies…they…

…None of them make it past the first hour.

* * *

><p>She visits Gabriela and sighs. "She's beautiful." She whispers, looking down at the month old baby.<p>

Gabriela smiles from her position by the kitchen table and nods. "Yeah, she's got her dada's eyes though."

She swallows.

* * *

><p>(Caroline meets Daniele one day at the market and the first thing she sees is the eyes.<p>

He has sparkling bright eyes that are wild and wide and warm and kind and are so beautiful…she's pretty sure she's fallen in love with him on the spot).

* * *

><p>She gets brought in a few weeks into her sixteenth year to see her mother. Her very pregnant, in labor mother.<p>

She stays calm and clutches her mother tight and whispers soft reassurances and stays by her side.

Seven hours later a baby boy is pressed into her arms.

"David." Her mother whispers, eyes glossy and tired.

* * *

><p>(Bianca doesn't make it past the next hour).<p>

* * *

><p>She takes David home and ignores Raul's gaze and sets up a place for her baby brother inside of her heart.<p>

* * *

><p>Caroline tries. She does. She tries to raise David right and tells the kid stories about their mother and puts up with Raul and goes to church and visits Gabriela and stays clear of Daniele (because good wives don't look at other men) and tries to have more babies.<p>

* * *

><p>(When she's seventeen, she talks to Daniele for the first time.<p>

There have been shared, longing glances before and brief smiles but never words.

"Hey."

"Hey."

She walks away because if she's anything it's a good wife).

* * *

><p>Gabriela asks because she knows. "You don't love Raul, do you?"<p>

"…No."

"…You'll learn…it takes time."

_Time I don't have._

* * *

><p>David's first words are <em>Bianca<em> and _home_ and Caroline holds her baby brother tight to her chest as tears make their way down her eyes.

* * *

><p>She visits her dada and asks him if he wants to see David.<p>

He throws a bottle at her head and tells her to stay gone.

She stays gone.

* * *

><p>The years pass by in peace and she takes care of David and tolerates Raul and talks to Gabriela and sneaks gazes at Daniele and stays quiet and in the background and watches the stars the nights she can't breathe and holds onto her remaining sanity tight.<p>

* * *

><p>When she's nineteen Daniele slips her a white poppy flower as she passes by him and she hides it under David's bed because she'll be damned if Raul takes something else from her.<p>

* * *

><p>Since Caroline can't give him kids Raul turns to other women and when she finds this out…she doesn't really care all that much. And that scares her more than anything because ladies are supposed to care about these kinds of things and if she doesn't care about that, then what does she care about?<p>

* * *

><p>When David's five Ermes get remarried and suddenly he wants his kid back and she can't do a thing because she's a lady and ladies can't do anything.<p>

* * *

><p>(She cries herself to sleep for two weeks after David's gone).<p>

* * *

><p>Two more years pass and by then David's forgotten her (Ermes made <em>sure<em> of that) and she's lost two other babies and Daniele's suddenly vanished and she only has Gabriela left to hold her up.

* * *

><p>She gets told later by Gabriela who'd heard it from Ada who'd gotten it from Guilia who'd listened in on her husband saying that Daniele has gone away to be a merchant and will probably never come back.<p>

She throws out the collected poppies underneath the now dusty crib and feels a bit of her heart die out.

* * *

><p>(Caroline is sixty-three percent sure she could have loved Daniele had she had the chance).<p>

* * *

><p>"You don't love me." Raul whispers one night, fingers tangled in her golden hair.<p>

She sighs and resists the urge to flinch away from his touch. "…I do."

He smiles sadly and for a moment she sees in him a man she can possibly, one day, learn to love. "Liar." Then the smile is gone and she is right back to where she'd been from the beginning.

* * *

><p>Caroline hears about it on one of the days she spends watching David from afar. He's grown so much and he's so beautiful and has such pretty grey eyes and her hair and…and he doesn't know her.<p>

She's been able to inch a bit closer when Gabriela suddenly walks up to her, eyes frantic and wild. She barely calms her friend down enough to hear her through the panics.

All she can get out of the redhead are the words plague and witchcraft and death and she's suddenly finding herself very tired.

* * *

><p>They call it the Bubonic Plague.<p>

It comes…it comes out of _nowhere_ and suddenly people are locking doors and wearing ridiculous beak masks and covering themselves in scents and hiding away and dying off and getting infected and rotting from the inside out and…

…And all Caroline can think of is David and how he's supposed to survive.

* * *

><p>It spreads fast.<p>

Within three months time close to half of the population's gone down and no one understands and some say it's airborne and others say it's because of spirits and others think it's God and amidst all of this chaos she keeps a close eye on David and makes sure Ermes takes care of him and then one day Gabriela's coming over and her eyes are excited and bright and she's clutching several bags with her.

"Um…" She can't think of anything else to say but that's okay because Gabriela does that for her: "I have a solution."

* * *

><p>Witchcraft. Magic. The Dark Arts.<p>

Gabriela wants her to become a witch.

"Caroline, _it will work_. I promise. It – it just needs a little something in return. That's all."

Caroline eyes the alter reluctantly before folding her arms tighter around herself and shaking her head. "No. No. This is – this is _wrong_! You know it is. It's asking for our souls. Our _souls_."

Caroline isn't perfect. By no means is she perfect but she loves God. She believes in God. She believes in Heaven and salvation and the Church and the rules and…and Hell. And she knows, she _knows_ if they go down the road her friend wants them to there is no going back.

Gabriela's eyes harden over at this and she glances back over at her sleeping toddler. "I'm doing this for her. You? For David. How long do you think he has until he gets infected?"

Silence.

Caroline sits down and clasps Gabriela's hand in hers.

For David.

* * *

><p>They set up a routine. Caroline goes over every night to Gabriela's or vice versa and they worship and pray and sacrifice little bunnies ("i'm so, so, so sorry for this, i swear, it's for my brother and – " "caroline! stop talking to the sacrifices!") and draw blood and offer their services.<p>

It isn't until two weeks in that they get a response and when they do Caroline feels her chest tighten as the feminine voice curls itself around her mind because she's always known she'd do anything for David but she'd never considered it'd go so far.

* * *

><p>By the end of that week Caroline and Gabriela are both soulless and sacrificing nightly.<p>

* * *

><p>It all comes undone the day their village gets locked in because they need to quarantine and they can't risk the plague spreading.<p>

It spreads anyways.

No one goes outside and when they do they're covered head to toe and they were protective charms and stay clear of the sickly but in the end, it isn't enough and people kept dying and leaving and…and one night Gabriela doesn't come over.

And then a week passes without a word.

Now, Caroline would have gone over sooner had she not been busy spying on David and making sure she was getting her soul's worth of protection for him and that Raul lived and was okay and that she didn't get sick.

She eventually sneaks out, covered as best as she can and goes on over to Gabriela's, ignoring the paranoid looks and the ruby eyes (what the fuck is _wrong_ with these people?) and the suspicious glares.

She enters the small home carefully and the stench that hits her as soon as she's inside is revolting. It's dark and musky and deep and it…it smells like death. Her eyes begin to water and her nose crinkles itself up and dear God it is _horrible._ She covers her face as best she can and as she makes her way over to the baby's crib she feels bile rise in her throat as she's greeted with a blackened, swollen corpse.

Caroline stumbles away from the baby girl, hands shaking and teeth trembling and makes her way into the bedroom, desperate to see Gabriela asleep and fine and…and she goes inside to see her friend with black feet and hands and swells around her arms and her face bloody and swollen and her stomach…Caroline turns to the side and throws up, back aching and throat sore and heart broken.

She wipes at her mouth shakily and makes her way over to her friend. She crawls over her body and begins to shake her, desperate to wake her up. "No. No, no, it's – it's not fair! Wake up. You have to wake up. Gabriela!" She pleads, tears making their way down her cheeks. "You're all I have left! Please!"

Silence.

A sob escapes from her throat and she throws herself over the body, clutching it tight and sobbing into the cold flesh.

* * *

><p>(When Caroline finally goes home she scratches absently at her neck with slow hands and wipes away at her cheeks that are itchy with tears).<p>

* * *

><p>It takes two days for her to notice the red swells on her hands.<p>

* * *

><p>She pleads to the unknown force that night, begging for more time to take care of her brother.<p>

She gets no answer.

* * *

><p>By the third day she can't move out of bed without pain rushing through her and even then her feet are black and her hands and fingers are getting there and she has blisters in places blisters should <em>never<em> be and her fever won't go down and by the end of that day she's seeing her mama everywhere.

* * *

><p>When Caroline isn't whispering to delusions in the air she turns to Raul, who hasn't left her side once and sighs: "T-take care of him. David."<p>

Raul nods, hands trembling and voice hoarse. "I will."

She smiles, lips weak and sweaty. "I – I think I," She frowns and forces the words out because she thinks he deserves to know. "I could have loved you. Maybe. If – "

He hushes her once she starts to cough up blood.

"Goodbye Raul." She mutters.

He shook his head at this, his own lips trembling now. "No. No, it's okay. The doctor's coming. You just have to make it another two hours."

* * *

><p>(Caroline passes away an hour later).<p>

* * *

><p>Raul burns her body alongside a reluctant Ermes.<p>

* * *

><p>It's bright. Really bright. And hot. Blistering hot and her shoulders hurt a lot and the stench of burning flesh is overwhelming and…and she opens her eyes to see nothing.<p>

Nothing but flashes of bodies and silver and dark blood and limbs and she looks up to see hooks impaling her shoulders and her…her blood is on them and oh God she – she's in Hell and she can't breathe and sh-she's dead and no one's there to take care of David now and she's all alone and oh God it hurts and she can't do this, no, she can't she wants Raul back because although he'd been a shitty husband he loves her in his own way and oh God all the air's gone and her vision's gone and…

* * *

><p>(She screams for hours. The tears roll down her cheeks and she fights against the restrains although that only causes them to tear deeper into her skin and bones and she calls out for David, for Gabriela, for Raul, for Daniele, for <em>anyone<em>.

No one comes).

* * *

><p>Five days go on by before anyone comes to her.<p>

By then she's too tired to scream and she's numb everywhere and her eyes are too dry and she can barely breathe.

She sees the red hair first. The flaming red hair and for a second she starts to hope that maybe it's Gabriela and that she's found her and all is going to get better but then the figure steps closer and those are green eyes…

…The girl walks over to her calmly and she has cold eyes and she's beautiful and maybe, maybe she's there to help but then she's picking up a blade and carving into her chest and oh God it _burns_. She starts to fight back and thrash but that only makes the blade go deeper and she can't breathe past the blindly pain but she can still hear the girl over the blood rushing to her ears:

"I'm Kristy…I get the feeling we're going to be really good friends."

* * *

><p>She learns quickly that in Hell, death means nothing. Kristy… Kristy kills her at least seven times a day, smile firmly in place but none of it matters and neither do her tears or pleads because she'll be brand new in a few seconds anyways.<p>

* * *

><p>Times loses meaning fast.<p>

Kristy tells her that time moves differently where they are and that it doesn't matter how hard she screams, that no one will hear her. No one cares about her.

Caroline ignores all of this and screams anyways because she needs _someone_ to hear her.

* * *

><p>The flames lick away at her skin and her flesh boils on its own the days she's left to her own devices and she can't tell how long it's been since she's seen a familiar face.<p>

* * *

><p>Kristy doesn't stay.<p>

One day the redhead walks over and frowns, running her bloody nails along her exposed bones and scratches along the veins. "I'll be back soon. I promise. But you haven't been cooperating lately so they're calling someone else in."

And then she's walking away despite Caroline's pleads because although the redhead's cruel, she's all she knows.

* * *

><p>They pass her around and she gets a new torturer every few days and it burns and it hurts and she can't cry anymore because crying only gets her her cheeks slashed and she doesn't know how much longer she can hold off.<p>

* * *

><p>Alastair tells her it's only been two months for everyone else but that it feels longer for her because for every month they get, she receives about ten years.<p>

Kristy had been cruel. Alastair is crueler.

* * *

><p>Around her fiftieth year when she still hasn't broken a man with black eyes comes and she thinks she might be getting a break because he looks reasonable... but then he starts to caress her skin and starts to whisper into her ears and she breaks all over.<p>

* * *

><p>She starts to hallucinate around fifty-five and it's usually David she sees. It alternates between David and Gabriela and it's nice having someone to talk to as the man with the black eyes peels her skin and tells her stories and takes what isn't his.<p>

* * *

><p>("He lived you know…that boy. The one you're here for. He's alive." The man with the black eyes says.<p>

It's her seventieth year and she can only vaguely remember David's voice).

* * *

><p>"Name, do you have a name?" The black-eyed man asks a few years later and she barely glances up from where her chin's resting on her bloody chest and her faded blue eyes meet his slowly.<p>

"C-carol," She clears her dry throat. "It's Caroline."

The man thins his lips and nods. "Crowley."

* * *

><p>(Crowley tells her the plague's gone and that David survived but that he doesn't even remember her so what was the point).<p>

* * *

><p>Caroline tries. She does. She really, really tries.<p>

But she can't. She can't hold out any longer and the hallucinations are only so comforting and she had no idea she was capable of losing so much blood and she says yes one day because she just _can't_.

* * *

><p>(She picks up the whip first and sighs as a soul's placed in front of her).<p>

* * *

><p>To get herself through the days she imagines David and his wavering toothless smile and those little chubby fingers that always held her now dry and stringy hair tight.<p>

* * *

><p>The years flash on by and before she knows it she can't remember the color of David's hair or the shape of Raul's lips or what shade Gabriela's hair had been.<p>

* * *

><p>She gets rewarded for good behavior.<p>

Year ninety-one has Crowley offering her a hand, pulling her closer and: "want to see what a healthy world looks like?"

They come out in what's now Asia and it's bright. It's all so bright and loud and colorful and she had forgotten what rain feels like.

He indulges her and lets her roam around for a bit before he's pulling her down under yet again.

* * *

><p>(She falls in love with the surface world and hungers for more).<p>

* * *

><p>Kristy comes back to see her one day while she's busy torturing.<p>

"I'm proud of you. I told you you could do it." She states, running her fingers through Caroline's matted hair.

"I hate you." She whispers as she continues to crack the woman's spline.

"No, you love me." Kristy presses a single kiss to her bloody temple before disappearing off into the shadows once more.

* * *

><p>(At two hundred she forgets her mama's name).<p>

* * *

><p>She starts to harden herself.<p>

She can't be weak and frail and background anymore. No. She has to be strong and hard and mean because there's no one left for her to look after.

* * *

><p>This gains her another reward and this time Crowley makes her watch as he plucks a pretty blonde out of the crowd and <em>breaks<em> her.

* * *

><p>He explains it all to her. About the body snatching and the black smoke and the limitations and the strengths.<p>

He soaks her in holy water, drowns her in salt and teaches her how to be _strong._

* * *

><p>She doesn't resurface for a while after that one.<p>

* * *

><p>She quickly moves up the ladder and they praise her skills and how well she does at making the souls scream and she feels a part of that humanity she'd been clutching so tightly to leave.<p>

* * *

><p>More years pass and she gets used to the flames and she doesn't mind when Crowley shows up and cruelly shows her the surface world and takes more of what isn't his and she doesn't care when Alastair tortures besides her and she doesn't show emotion when Kristy gets jealous and she doesn't cry anymore because she can only vaguely remember what she'd been crying for.<p>

* * *

><p>Four hundred.<p>

On her four hundredth year they place a familiar redhead before her and as weak, scared blue eyes bore into hers she drops the whip and steps back.

"Gabriela."

* * *

><p>(In the end she does it anyways because if not her then someone else would have).<p>

* * *

><p>She finds herself back on the other end of the scalpel after they take Gabriela away.<p>

"No, no, please. I-I've been g-good and I did it. I-I tortured Gabriela and I – "

Alastair hushes her, lips pressed to her bloody chest. "Hush child, it'll all be all right."

She finds she does have tears left.

* * *

><p>(Her punishment for hesitating is three hundred years.<p>

She forgets the color of Gabriela's eyes as she coughs up blood and has her skin peeled).

* * *

><p>Crowley brushes bangs out of her eyes and sighs, "This is for the best. You'll see. You're going to make a wonderful addition."<p>

She moves away from his touch and says nothing.

* * *

><p>(When she's finally let off it's been over a thousand years now and all they tell her is that she's almost there, that she just has to hold out a bit longer).<p>

* * *

><p>She tries to run away.<p>

Tries.

She knows where there are loose gates and she knows the rules and she knows how to adjust and survive now.

* * *

><p>She lasts a week before she realizes that there's a reason Hell feels like home.<p>

It is.

* * *

><p>Alastair punishes her with his tongue and his hands instead of his blade.<p>

* * *

><p>She doesn't run again.<p>

* * *

><p>When Crowley comes over to tell her stories of a man named Raul she frowns and tries but can't remember why that name should be important.<p>

* * *

><p>One day Kristy's placed before her.<p>

She grins at the now powerless redhead and picks up a long blade, sighing as she presses it against the pale skin. "Hey," She breathes before proceeding to cut the redhead's heart out.

* * *

><p>The centuries continue to flash on by and it's all a haze of blood and cold and taunts and laughs and Crowley makes sure to visit every few ones to let her know how things are going upstairs and she has to pretend she doesn't care that there's a different world out there that she should be a part of.<p>

Never again.

* * *

><p>(Caroline meets Lilith on the anniversary of her three thousandth year.<p>

The blonde makes her way over and eyes Caroline as she continues to work and break a man's legs.

"Caroline…I don't like the name. Change it."

She looks up with hollow eyes and asks: "Who's Caroline?")

* * *

><p>Kristy comes to see her. "You're nothing. They think you can do it but you can't because you're <em>nothing<em>."

* * *

><p>She clings on tight to the small remains of her humanity because she can still remember the fact that she's only there in the first place out of love and if she'd loved that person enough to go to Hell she should love them enough to remember.<p>

* * *

><p>(She asks Crowley because the Scottish man has never lied to her before.<p>

Black eyes meet her pale blue ones.

"David. His name was David and he was your brother and you loved him.")

* * *

><p>She starts to cry again.<p>

* * *

><p>(She names herself Ruby the day Kristy comes by to ask her how she's supposed to survive if she doesn't even know who she is).<p>

* * *

><p>She shines under their approval and says all the right things and cuts into all the needed souls and calculates her escape and whispers apologies to the suffering souls and prays to a long lost God that she'll make it out.<p>

* * *

><p>Ten thousand years in and all she has left is the persona Ruby and the love she'd once had as a human for a little boy with grey eyes.<p>

* * *

><p>Crowley comes to see her after she's become hard and edgy and able to snap back snarky comebacks.<p>

He gazes at her with surprisingly soft eyes and holds a large piece of silver to her face. "Look."

In place of her pale blue eyes there are now onyx orbs staring back at her.

* * *

><p>(She cries as she tortures and says she's sorry but that she needs to survive).<p>

* * *

><p>Crowley brings her up and shows her how to use her stolen body and her mind and the first time she sends him through a wall with a simple look, he gazes at her with what can only be described as pride.<p>

* * *

><p>When Kristy comes around she matches the insults right on back and all this gets her is a pleased smirk from the cruel redhead.<p>

* * *

><p>Another twenty thousands years go on by and by then she's been there for around forty thousand years and that's when Lilith comes over again and sighs: "Congrats kid, you graduated."<p>

* * *

><p>She's told by Crowley later that she's now a full demon and doesn't ever have to worry because now she's powerful and strong and <em>you are going to be brilliant darling.<em>

She nods numbly.

* * *

><p>(Crowley goes away for a long while and instead Alastair starts to visit and a somewhat familiar brunette with an enticing voice and she can't help but think she misses Crowley).<p>

* * *

><p>She does recognize her, eventually.<p>

"You took my soul."

The cruel brunette smirks and with that familiar enticing feminine voice tells her, "You gave it to me."

* * *

><p>Whispers start to circulate and they involve talk of a boy king and the savior and the one who's going to bring forth a new age.<p>

She's not sure what it means, if it'll do her any good but this is it.

Here's her ticket out. Here's her reason to keep going.

* * *

><p>On the days the pain's really bad she has to stop and remind herself that she's better than all of it and can survive and can be different and that she's going to chance <em>everything.<em>

* * *

><p>At sixty thousand Lilith comes over and scowls at her. "You're not getting out of here. Try to pretend all you want but we both know you're just bidding your time. You're not strong enough to survive, not with this attitude, not while you're still clinging to that stupid, tattered soul of yours."<p>

Ruby turns and clings to her stupid, tattered soul that much tighter and continues waiting for her boy king.

* * *

><p>She learns about the coming war from Kristy. The redhead's bragging about having an in with Lilith and knowing all and knowing the prophecy and <em>there's a boy with demon blood who's going to take over. <em>

_Azazel is going to mold him and make him brilliant._

She takes this all in slowly and stores it away.

Then she learns about the angels.

* * *

><p>Ruby pours all her energy into torturing and she tries to enjoy it, she does but all she can think of as she watches them wither and thrash underneath her hands is that they might be someone else's grey-eyed boy.<p>

* * *

><p>It's nearly her eighty thousandth year when she hears about the Winchesters and the arrival of the Boy King and the brother who would do anything for him.<p>

It's almost time, except she's getting tired of waiting.

* * *

><p>Alastair sends her out on a scouting mission.<p>

His first mistake.

* * *

><p>She gets done what needs to get done and then gets done to business.<p>

If she's going to help the boy king and protect him from Azazel (_whispers, there are whispers of azazel's power and his strength and his name brings chills to the bones of all_) then she needs allies and she needs them now.

* * *

><p>She makes the right connections in the surface world, sets up a network and makes sure to piss off all the right and wrong people.<p>

She can do this. She can win.

* * *

><p>She tries to find Crowley for goodbye. Wants to thank him, for building her up, for making her who she is. For making sure that one day she'll be strong enough to kill him.<p>

He stays away and she bids her time.

* * *

><p>She's tired when it happens.<p>

Really tired. She's ready to give up and kick start the damn war herself, ready to maybe let go of the fragile remains she'd been clinging so desperately and hungrily to when she hears the whispers and suddenly everyone's fighting and clawing and pushing and then she hears that a devil's gate has been opened and it's her chance to be free.

It's a little ahead of schedule but she takes it.

* * *

><p>(It takes a long time. She has to push and kill and maim her way towards the door for what feels like years but then she's suddenly there and she's <strong><em>free<em>**).

* * *

><p>It's been a while, a good number of decades since she last resurfaced but she finds her footing quickly. Observing and calculating and she has work to do.<p>

* * *

><p>She meets a fellow creature of the night while researching for escaped things like herself and the name Eleanor had led to her an abandoned house in California.<p>

She ends up with her back pressed to a wall and a knife at her throat, "You must be Eleanor." She chuckles.

"You must be Ruby." The creature replies. "I've heard rumors about you. The rogue demon. Trying to save the world, one hunt at a time. Good luck with that by the way."

"…Want to help?"

The blonde pauses and shrugs. "What do you need?"

"The Winchesters."

Eleanor thins her lips and releases her. "Come with me."

* * *

><p>It's going well. Really well.<p>

She's built herself the reputation that she'd hoped she would and her names strikes fear and confusion into the tattered hearts of all the right people.

She has the resources and the knowledge and she is going to turn the tide for this coming war if it's the last thing she does but the thing is, when she looks into the mirror at night she doesn't recognize who staring back.

* * *

><p>She finds a witch in Tallahassee, a descendent who'll recreate her previous body in exchange for a Grimoire.<p>

Ten hours, two trips to Nashville and three scars later she hands the brunette the book with a sharp glare.

"A name. I need a name."

She pauses and frowns. "I-I…Carol…Care…Caroline. It was Caroline."

The witch sighs, "Works for me."

* * *

><p>She hands the witch a simple bowie knife and, "I need one more favor."<p>

* * *

><p>She looks down at her newly reformed body and sighs, glancing into the mirror. "I have a lot of work to do."<p>

* * *

><p>(That night she dreams of blood and fire and silver and she's waking to gasps and tears and has to stay up the rest of the night).<p>

* * *

><p>She does more research and learns all she can about the Winchesters and crossroads deals and starts to think it might not be worth it all.<p>

But then she remembers David and her love and all she suffered and how long she suffered and keeps on going.

* * *

><p>She finds the supposed Boy King in Nebraska and starts to track him slowly and stays out of the way because if what she's heard is true then she needs to be careful around him and his brother.<p>

She is not going to let them screw up hundreds of years worth of planning and strategy.

* * *

><p>She ends up interfering anyways because she can't really help them if he's dead now can she?<p>

The boy stares at her with disbelieving eyes, wide and honest and tired and she is going to have her hands full with this one isn't she? "Who the hell are you?"

She smirks slyly that smirk she'd perfected while down under and had flashed at so many burning souls before him. "I'm the girl that just saved your ass."

"Well, I just saved yours too." He stammers, unsure and unbalanced but still oh so defiant and strong. She starts to think she might like him.

She lets a small smile replace the smirk and sighs, "See you around Sam."

* * *

><p>It isn't until later when she's lying in a dirty motel bed (and dear God here she'd thought hygiene had improved) and she's too afraid to fall asleep that she remembers the look of utter defeat in the Winchester's eyes and starts to think that maybe she's in way over her head.<p> 


End file.
